Showing posts with label dull. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dull. Show all posts

i'm sorry, I AM SO Sorry!

in my short life, I've met allot of people, seen, heard, talked and for sure loved, allot of people.
I was also hurt by the people I've met, most of them if not all of them hurt me once or twice, wither they hurt me by a word, a gesture, a conversation behind my back or even a look, I was hurt by most if not all of the people I met...


some people did not know that they've hurt me, so i didnt hear something from them, but some knew that they did, but not all of them said it.
I am sorry...


does it work? yes, it does, but is it enough?
you see when someone hurts you very bad, that it might cause depression for a week or two, when someone hurts you very bad, that you might consider a drastic change in life, when they hurt you so bad, that you turn into a sock on the floor, useless, i mean what can you do with one sock? except for maybe stuff it with sand and make a useless make believe puppet out of it, at that time, at that moment, and in that intensity, does sorry really work?


i've heard sorry for so many times, it just stopped working on me, now i need a gesture to really forgive someone...


i might need a hug, a kiss, a promise sometimes a small little look, because the word sorry is just warren out, sorry alone doesnt mean anything to me.
when i hurt someone, i stay days, maybe weeks tormenting myself about it, and the people who've met me, the people who've really gotten to know me noticed that when i hurt some one i get obsessed in trying to make it up for them, not just by a word, not just by sorry, because sorry alone is not enough!


its not enough, it needs real feelings, real meaning, real moments, it needs to be intense so you would be forgiven, so you would feel it, so you could feel it for real, so real in fact you might never hurt any one again, because only when you feel sorry, you realize how horrible it is to hurt someone.

kel 3am wenta b5air, o0 308bal el alf kaf

عشرين تسعه, عشرين سبتمبر, يوم عادي بالنسبه للبعض, يوم مثير, يوم سعيد, او حتى حزين , كل يرى الايام بعين طبعة المهم, هذا اليوم, هو عيد ميلاد "الحب" اللي دايما ماخذ بالي, وقبل هاليوم يمكن بشهر, وانا اودر واحط واعدل وارتب, واختار هدية مناسبة, وحلوه, يعني, على قد المقام ادري, لان انا مو من الناس اللي حسابهم فيه اكثر من صفرين, المهم, ما لقيت شي يسوى, او بالاصح, شي يسوى بالمبلغ البسيط اللي عندي, ويا يوم السفر, اللي كان خمسه سبتمبر او شي جذي ما اذكر بالضبط, فرحت وسافرت ووصلت, وانا في بالي شي واحد, ما زهبت شي!ـ

المهم بعد مده طويله, واكثر من غرض اشتريتهم وتوهقت لاني قلت لا المفروض شي احسن او احلى, يا يوم عشرين سبتمبر, واتصلت الساعه 12 نص الليل اول ما بدى اليوم, علشان اكون اول واحد قدم تهنأه في نفس اليوم, اتصلت, اشلوونك الحب؟ شخبارك؟ مشتاق لك! مزهب لك مفاجأه!ـ
وياني الرد الصاعق – هذي الصاعق سامعها لالتلفزيون – " محد يعرف اييب هدايا, الا *****, وانا شخص عندي كل شي, فما اتوقع انك تييب لي شي مو عندي"ـ
كل عام وانت بخير حبيبي Sollai وعقبال الالف!
ويبقى السؤال الاخير اللي لازم تسأله لنفسك, ليش في ناس ما تفهم؟ـ